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Inspire & Ignite Blog
FRONT ROW SEAT OF DISCERNMENT
These days, I am crossing a threshold as a parent. As I write this, my daughter and I are on a flight to one of two colleges she is trying to decide between. She has been accepted to both, and both meet the approval of her parents, so the ball is completely in her court. For my part, I am simply trying to pay close attention while staying out of the way.
It’s been a journey to get to this point. At the beginning, the search was a bit dominated by things like geography and climate, which I will admit today to giving me a fair amount of heartburn. But I committed myself to being patient with the journey, and sure enough, deeper considerations began to emerge. Today we awaken in the heartland, 29 degrees and the sun is nowhere in sight. Given how this journey has progressed however, I will be surprised if this is even part of our conversations today. Time will tell.
I don’t know if my daughter’s process is the same or different than others, or whether my next child’s process will be anything like this one, but I have enjoyed learning what is on her mind as she considers this important decision that will shape her continued formation and her future. For me it has been a little like unwrapping a surprise present, beginning to understand my child as an adult. Not that I am in a hurry for this, but it’s happening regardless. I have been impressed with her remarkable calm through this process, and how much effort she has put into figuring out what is the right place for her. Even if she’s not all the way there yet, this surely is an adult decision.
A couple of weeks ago, Mr. Tricco wrote about discernment and choosing between two good things. Making a decision about which college to attend is a great example of what he was talking about. He talked about important preconditions, like freedom. It can be tricky sometimes to determine if we are truly free from ‘inordinate attachments’—people or things that actually get in the way of hearing God’s guidance.
Determining if we are following God’s voice, our own or someone else’s is not always easy, especially since God may choose to speak to us through those people who love us the most. That’s why I want to be very careful here. The discernment is Delaney’s. If she asks for perspective from me, I will give it, but there is only one person who can discern where she is being called.
In a couple of hours, we will be visiting the campus and meeting some of its people. Delaney will be imagining herself in the environment. I will just be accompanying her and paying close attention. What will we unwrap next on this journey? I’m looking forward to it, even if it is one more sign that time does not stand still.
While she may be a long way from concluding this process, it’s also possible that today is the day that a decision is formed in her heart. How cool would that be?
Wish us luck!
AMDG
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David Card '87 is Regis Jesuit's president. He writes for Inspire & Ignite once a month, usually for the first week, throughout the school year.
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David Card '87 is Regis Jesuit's president. He writes for Inspire & Ignite once a month, usually for the first week, throughout the school year.
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